Christmas parties always seem like a good idea. Free food and drink, a dodgy DJ and maybe even some secret santa madness! It's the highlight of the office social calendar and bound to keep the resident gossip happy well into the New Year.

In fact, Christmas Parties would be great if it wasn't for one thing...

We've all been there. You're happily knecking the free bubbly and contemplating whether hitting the buffet table for a third time would be a little excessive when suddenly you realise your alone, with the boss, and you have absolutely nothing to say.

But no fear, the Graduates Yorkshire team have come to the rescue. We've rounded up a collection of the best (and worst) Xmas jokes around so you'll never be stuck for something to say at a Xmas party ever again.

Read on for some priceless ice breakers guaranteed* to make your name stand out of the crowd when he dishes out the Christmas bonus’s.

"Where does Santa go when he has the flu? The National Elf Service!"

"What never eats at Christmas time? The Turkey, it's usually stuffed."

"What do angry mice send at Christmas? Cross mouse cards."

"What did Santa get when he crossed a reindeer with a piece of wood? A hat rack."

"What do you call a rich elf? Welfy"

"What do you call someone who doesn't believe in Father Christmas? A rebel without a Claus!"

"What sort of mobile phone has Santa got? Pay as you ho, ho, ho!"

Assessment Centres are like an extended job interview, where you will take part in a number of formal and informal activities designed to test how suitable you are for the role.

They're usually after the first round of interviews, but some employers use them as an initial selection process to identify candidates for interview. They can be a day or two long and might include an overnight stay in a hotel.

Imogen Short from HBOS plc tells us: "Assessment Centres can be daunting. What you need to remember is that you've been picked to attend the assessment centre because the company see's real promise in you as a candidate. They've seen your potential in the initial stages of recruitment so this is an opportunity for you to show them how good you really are."

Many employers think that assessment centres are fairer and more accurate than standard job interviews, as they get a chance to see what you can really do, not just what you say you can do. They're also great for you, as it's a chance to really show off your skills through practical tasks and activities.

You'll probably be in a group with other candidates and will complete a number of tests, exercises and interviews which will have been designed to test the qualities you have against those required for the job.

Common assessment activities include group discussions, team exercises, interviews, psychometric tests, case study scenarios and presentations. They may also include more informal activities, such as team games or a chance to socialise with current employees.

Recruiters will be testing you against the skills needed for the job (these were probably mentioned in the job advert which is a good point of reference if you're unsure) as well as other essential skills such as communication, team work and problem solving. They may also want to see how you react in practical situations, whether you can keep cool under pressure and think on your feet.

More information on Assessment Centres, how to prepare and what to expect can be found in our application advice section .

Your University Careers service might also be able to offer you further guidance. Find out how to contact them here.

Graduate opportunities at HBOS plc can be found here.

Assessment centres are more than just an interview. It's a chance for the employer to find out whether you would fit into the company and whether the career path is right for you.

Rob Owen, a Retail Programmes graduate from HBOS plc advises: "You should approach Assessment Centres with an open and honest attitude. Be yourself. You don't want to work for a company where you won't fit in and enjoy your job. Let the assessor decide if you are right for the culture of the company - better a 'no' now than hating your job six months down the line.

"Also explain to the assessor your reasons for applying and what you expect to get out of the company. If the company can't provide you with the career you want, then you may be better off looking for something elsewhere."

New research by PricewaterhouseCoopers LLP found that more than half of final-year students plan to look for work unrelated to their ideal career, as finding any job has become a bigger priority than finding the right job.

It's easy in a competitive job market to see every opportunity as the first step on the ladder, but taking a detour away from your ideal career can make it harder for you get back to the right path later.

Being honest about your aspirations may close doors if the company can't offer you what you want, but it might open doors too. They may be able to offer you the option in a graduate scheme to spend time with a department of the company that really interests you and you may even be able to specialise in that area once the scheme is complete.

If the company can't give you the opportunities you want then don't despair. Job hunting's not easy; especially in the current market. But if you've worked hard to get a good degree and a CV worthy of your ideal career, your big break could be just around the corner.

Find out more about writing CV's and gaining work experience here.

Graduate opportunities at HBOS plc can be found here.

John in the Graduates Yorkshire office tells us he saw Santa one Xmas and guess what? He spoke in a Yorkshire accent - just like his dad! So this year we're going to leave him a "made in Yorkshire" t-shirt instead of the usual mince pies and sherry. A red one, because we've heard that's his colour.

You can order your own "made in Yorkshire T-shirt" online now. It's the perfect stocking filler, comes in a colour to suit every taste and is a budget busting £12. Order before 15^th December and you're guaranteed to receive it in time for Xmas.

Order your T-Shirt and pay by credit or debit card online here.

Become a fan of Graduates Yorkshire on Facebook and you'll get to find out what's going on for graduates in the region first. We'll be keeping our Facebook page updated with all the latest Careers Fairs and events that could help you find that perfect job. Many of the 2009 fairs are already in the calendar, check them out online here.

You can also ask us your careers related questions, send us your feedback and suggestions and checkout our gallery.

Become a fan on Facebook here.

The Graduates Yorkshire team will mainly be found in the office during December, singing along to Mariah Carey's "all I want for Christmas" and munching on Mince Pies.

However, you can catch up with us at:

• The Careers with a Conscience Fair, 4th December, Sheffield Hallam University Students Union

Find out more by visiting www.sheffieldcareersfairs.ac.uk

We'll also be joining Pro-Sheffield for the Young Professionals Christmas Drinks.

The networking event held on the 10^th December at the Leadmill is a great place for graduates working in the city to meet other like minded professionals.

For further details email Ben Sequerra at bens@pro-sheffield.co.uk or visit them online at www.pro-sheffield.co.uk/groups/young-pro.asp

Techno savvy graduates need to shout louder about their skills says a new study.

The research by T-Mobile found employers value ‘mobile ready' graduates with proven experience of using laptops, mobile technology and the internet, but only about 10% of graduates remember to reference these skills on their CVs.

Roger Tweedy of the Recruitment and Employment Confederation says: "In careers such as sales, consultancy, marketing and events management, employees spend a large amount of time away from the office and businesses recognise that providing them with the appropriate technology can greatly increase their productivity, even at a junior level. If graduates already have the ability to use this technology they are in a better position to enter the workforce."

So get out your CV and check you're doing your technology skills justice. It might just be what gives you the edge over the competition in a competitive job market!

Find more tips on writing great CV's here.

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*Graduates Yorkshire cannot guarantee that any of the jokes featured in this newsletter will in fact result in a pay rise / promotion or any other benefit. In fact, we can’t guarantee anything at all. If you do end up in awkward conversation with your superior it might be better to ask what their plans are for Xmas with the spouse / partner / dog, compliment them on their choice of festive comedy tie / tinsel earrings, then head back to the buffet table for an extra slice of cake!